Tuesday, May 29, 2007

How many roads must a man walk down before you call him a man?

I will always remember the day Frank (my father) sang these words to me.
I, like so many other people have had many conflicting ideas about how to be a man.
Lesley (my mother) often criticized Frank, and only now am I beginning to understand what is likely to be true.
I believe there is no simple formula to follow. The advice "be yourself" may be true, though I did not find the advice at all useful.
After years of attempting to model Lesley's idea about what she expected of Frank, I have found that is definitely not the way to go. Many of the role models that I admired were not the best role models to follow. Many people said Frank was weak. Yet only now I have discovered that much of what others claimed to be Frank's weaknesses were in fact his strengths.
It was late in Frank's life when he sang that song to me.
I think he was still feeling lost in those roads to manhood.
I certainly was.

Read more about being a man