Communication difficulty
I could clearly see the difficulty that Mary and John were having. So I told them the following story.
"This guy used to regularly go to the fruit section of the supermarket and get a few of those curved yellow fruits that he enjoyed. However the supermarket had closed so he went to the greengrocer and asked for some oranges. He was very annoyed because the greengrocer, instead of giving him the sweet curved yellow fruits, gave him fruits which were shaped like a ball. Instead of the delicious creamy sweet taste, these tasted awfully tangy. He could not easily pull back the peel to eat them, and sticky reddish yellow juice leaked out on his hands, the plate and the table."
I asked John what he would do if he did not get what he wanted.
He said he would go to a different greengrocer.
Mary was shocked at the thought of John leaving her and going to another woman.
I continued on with the story.
"So next time he went to another greengrocer. This greengrocer did not give him the curved yellow fruits that he wanted either. The man thought this greengrocer is just as stupid as the first! Again he got round fruits. He said to himself "These idiot greengrocers are driving me bananas. They are so stupid!"
I asked John how he would feel if he kept getting round fruits instead of the sweet curved yellow ones that he wanted. He laughed and said he would probably throw the oranges back at the greengrocer.
Not only did Mary and John have a good laugh.
They also realized that the word "friendship" had a different meaning for John than it had for Mary.
That misunderstanding had been a major cause of their heated arguments they had often been having.
"This guy used to regularly go to the fruit section of the supermarket and get a few of those curved yellow fruits that he enjoyed. However the supermarket had closed so he went to the greengrocer and asked for some oranges. He was very annoyed because the greengrocer, instead of giving him the sweet curved yellow fruits, gave him fruits which were shaped like a ball. Instead of the delicious creamy sweet taste, these tasted awfully tangy. He could not easily pull back the peel to eat them, and sticky reddish yellow juice leaked out on his hands, the plate and the table."
I asked John what he would do if he did not get what he wanted.
He said he would go to a different greengrocer.
Mary was shocked at the thought of John leaving her and going to another woman.
I continued on with the story.
"So next time he went to another greengrocer. This greengrocer did not give him the curved yellow fruits that he wanted either. The man thought this greengrocer is just as stupid as the first! Again he got round fruits. He said to himself "These idiot greengrocers are driving me bananas. They are so stupid!"
I asked John how he would feel if he kept getting round fruits instead of the sweet curved yellow ones that he wanted. He laughed and said he would probably throw the oranges back at the greengrocer.
Not only did Mary and John have a good laugh.
They also realized that the word "friendship" had a different meaning for John than it had for Mary.
That misunderstanding had been a major cause of their heated arguments they had often been having.
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